5 Tips For Maintaining Friendships When Life Is Busy

When was the last time you saw your friends? That is a question I ask myself from time to time. The answer sometimes surprises me! Life gets so hectic that the things requiring a little extra effort – like maintaining friendships – can fall by the wayside. You forget to respond to text messages, miss the monthly hangout, or just stop reaching out because other things get in the way.

But here’s the thing: we need friendships! If you tend to let your friendships slip through the cracks when life gets stressful and busy, you’re not alone. However, it’s about time you make space for your friendships even when life is busy and chaotic! Keep reading for tips on maintaining friendships when life gets busy. 

Why your friendships suffer when life is busy

Life is busy – there is no way around it. You work all day, have family responsibilities, personal goals, hobbies, and everyday chaos. There is simply not enough time in the day to do it all. Not to mention enough energy to do it all. Unfortunately, many people don’t have the time or energy to nurture their friendships at the end of the day.

Friendships require effort and intention. When life gets busy it can feel like just another task on your to-do list. Answer messages, call someone back, make plans for next week… a usually fun and exciting time can feel draining.

Also, friendships usually don’t have a deadline attached to them. Hanging out with your friends doesn’t need to happen by Friday at 5pm or else your job is on the line. Friendships are therefore sometimes the easiest things to push aside.

Over time as you miss more and more get-togethers and chit-chats, reconnecting feels harder and more awkward. Before you know it, you feel out of touch and guilty. Making time for connection is crucial for friendships which can be hard when everyone is living busy lives.

The truth is, friendships are like any other type of relationship. The more time and energy to put into them, the more successful they tend to be. Being busy can alter friendships but it doesn’t need to end them. You get to decide what you put effort into and prioritizing your friendships – even in small ways – can make all the difference.

Let’s talk about ways to stay connected and maintain your friendships even if you are busy.

5 tips for maintaining friendships when life is busy

So, it’s easy to see how friendships fall apart. When life gets busy people don’t always prioritize maintaining friendships and nurturing relationships even though they may still want to. You are not going to be that person anymore! 

Here are 5 tips for maintaining friendships even when life is super busy. 

1. Schedule communication time

When life is busy you normally have some type of calendar or plan. You schedule doctor appointments, haircuts, or date nights with your partner. Why should it be any different with your friends?

Figure out a day and time to chat with your friends. Maybe that’s a phone call, video call, or even a regular hangout. Scheduling time for communication makes it easier to stick with since it’s already on your calendar. 

Some ideas for scheduling communication:

• Weekly phone calls when you are driving home from work
• Monthly video call over dinner together 
• Daily alarm on your phone to remind you to answer your text messages 
• Monthly coffee date at the local coffee shop 

2. Create rituals or traditions

There are so many ways to create rituals and traditions with your friends. You may already have some! Traditions give you something to look forward to and help ensure you’re carving out time for each other, no matter how hectic life gets. That could be a yearly dinner (like Friendsgiving) or monthly brunch. You could do this one-on-one or have big group gatherings.

Some ideas for rituals and traditions with your friends:

• Monthly book club
• Movie nights 
• Celebratory dinners for each others wins
• Galentines Day, Friendsgiving, Christmas gift exchange 
• Birthday trips

3. Involve your friends in your routines

I know there are routines that you already engage in. Workouts, grocery shopping, certain hobbies you spend time on… I suggest you involve your friends in those! At least from time to time. 

Combining friendship with already existing routines is the relationship equivalent of habit stacking! When you do [habit/routine] you spend time with [friend]. 

Some ideas for involving friends in your routines:

• Workout together 
• Go for walks
• Run errands/ weekly grocery shop
• Start a hobby together 
• Grab coffee when either of you needs car maintenance 

Related read: How To Change Your Life With Habit Stacking

4. Make use of virtual hangouts 

Maintaining friendship doesn’t need to be in person! You can stay connected by doing things virtually together. This is a great idea for long-distance friends but you can do this with anyone, even a friend that lives in the same city. 

Some ideas for virtual hangouts:

• Zoom movie nights 
• Virtual game night using apps like Jackbox or Board Game Arena
• Cook or bake together over video call 
• Do a craft together virtually

Related read: 25 Fun Indoor Hobbies You Need To Try

5. Have consistent little moments of connection 

This is just doing the little things that make friendships special. Hanging out and doing things together is not the only way to be a friend. Maintain friendships by consistently being there, even for just a small moment. These are the small actions that show you care and that no matter what, prove the friendship is important to you. 

Some examples of little moments of connection:

• A quick “thinking of you” text
• Sending funny videos/memes to each other 
• Checking in about something (like a new job, how that test went, what happened on the date, etc). 
• Send a picture of something that reminds you of them (a flower you saw, their favourite food, etc)

Final thoughts 

As you get older and more responsibilities pile up, it’s hard to maintain friendships. There are, however, many ways to stay connected and it doesn’t need to be difficult! 

You can do little things like respond to texts, schedule time to connect over the phone when driving home, create monthly rituals like movie nights, involve your friends in your routines like when you work out, or just simply send a funny video. 

Maintaining friendships when you are busy may seem nearly impossible when your time is eaten up by literally everything else but it’s so important for your overall well-being to stay connected with friends. 

Don’t let a busy schedule get in the way of special friendships!

How do you maintain friendships when you’re busy? Share your tips in the comments!